and so comes summer

Summer arrived without me really noticing. Our weather has been cool for most of June, a few rainy spells but not enough to scream....Summer is here! True, Crispin has had to have sunscreen on every day and we've been eating outdoors more nights than not but summer hasn't been on my mind. This week, I went to the farmer's market for fruit and veg and came home with Summer.

Yes~ organic grapes spliced into bunches and watermelon. Our new favourite way to keep it in the fridge is to cut it into cubes "Martha Style", label the container and eat it up. The boys love it this way and it is far less messy than in slices. We love summer fruit and vegetables!

Here are some pics of Fiona's new outfit...don't you just love those cherries!

And the lacy cuffs are so, so cute!

If you happen to be related to me (and say, are my mother), skip this next picture!

I've been working on this project for a little bit, in between Fiona's crying jags. To finish, I need to find some ME ribbon and some fabric paint. This is going to my Mum for her BD with the kids foot prints on the back.






And then there's us.....Miss Fiona, as seen above, is trying hard to walk and being extra "up baby" right now. I've taken to wearing her in the sling for part of the day. That has really helped my mood as well as hers! The boys have been busy the past month....Crispin finished off the school year with a stellar performance in a reader's theatre at school as the Wolf in the Three Little Pigs (edited version!). He was a *hoot* and so good as the wolf...his voice was even given a wolfy makeover. We're into the second day now of summer hols and oither than the never sleeping baby, we had an excellent day. Crispin is enjoying some time off and Greg is getting used to having to share his day with me again. I plan to have things a bit structured this summer....just to help the little ones along.



We're doing OK otherwise. Things sometimes still get overwhelming when we think about Winston. It really is hard to imagine that he's truly gone. C bought a large black stuffed cat that he sleeps with now and cuddles. It has made a world of difference for him.



Summer will be busy (I won't kid you along and think I'll be online lots this summer!) but I will be making an effort to post at least twice a week. Thought I'd finish with a fairly recent pic of us from Father's day too :)

Speak soon!

it's not in the remembering but in the forgetting...

It's been ten days and while the most wrenching grief has faded, we still notice the wound open up fresh every few days. And strangely, it isn't the remembering that makes it hurt the worst, it's the forgetting.

Forgetting like...

Leaving the laundry room door open a bit on a hot day when the dryer is running so that cat can get to his box

leaving blinds up at cat height so he can see out or at least not bang!

placing all plants up high

stepping around the area where the dishes are so we don't spill the water

and a myriad of other things that I hadn't realized we did. Like moving the couch to the window or calling his name out when we walk in the door or picking up little bits of string...

We find ourselves hearing his nails clicking on the floors and turn around to look for him, or hearing him meyowl or feeling the weight of him at the foot of the bed. And every time we forget, the wound opens up fresh again. For suddenly, far more than when we remember him, we miss him.

The boys are doing OK. Crispin has been devastated by the loss of the cat who was like his brother. He painted a wooden cat over the weekend and painted it black with yellow eyes... "so we can look at it and mourn Mummy". He talks all the time about getting another cat, a kitten.

Gregory was not particularly close to Winston . (my favourite memory of them being Gregory scolding W for coming into his room..."Winston, go out, I don't want you in here. I'm trying to sleep!") However, in the past week, his stripy stuffed cat has suddenly started sleeping where Winston used to sleep, using the box, playing with cat toys... "and Stripy won't eat too much grass and die Mummy". He wants another cat too.

We're just going to let it go for now....the summer looms and we have a few weeks away. It wouldn't be right to get another cat yet. However, in the autumn, we'll think about it again.


We've had illness here since Monday~ first Crispin, then Gregory with something different, now Steve is sick with the same thing and I have seasonal allergies. It's been a crazy week.

However, here's a pic of the only thing that will get Fiona to eat from a spoon!

Yep. Her biggest brother! He's a great baby feeder....takes it slow and easy, watches for smiles or had enough signs and encourages all the way. She's taken more spoonfuls of cereal and banana from him than she had from either Steve or me :)

Off to make lunch and get fans going...it's incredibly hot here right now!